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Homlessness

Enough depressing posts.


I went to the AGO today with my friends because they managed to get free passes, the same way they managed to get free passes to the zoo. So instead of diligently studying in the library/ doing research in labs, we diligently became art critics for one afternoon. It went well, because anything free is good.

So I'm starting a couple of projects soon. Recently, I just finished one, which was to make bookmarks and hand it out to my fellow nerds (this is a lot harder than it sounds). I'm stepping it up for my next project, which will be to help the homeless. Here are my ideas:

1) Sandwich run
Which is, to make sandwiches for the homeless and give pass it out. (and run while doing it, hence the name)

2) Sock donation
Get a bunch of socks and hand it out to those in need of socks.

3) Some kind of dental hygiene kit
Because we all know living on the street gives people bad breath.

Anyway, I know some of you reading this will roll your eye and wonder why on earth I would want to help the homeless people of Toronto. My answer is, why not? I have no good valid reason for doing this except that I want to. Most homeless people are not homeless by choice, they just unfortunately ran into a series of unfortunate events ... and may or may not have become mentally ill afterwards as a result.

I also want to plan the halloween party. Amy and I have already thought of awesome entertainment/games that everyone will take part in. One of them involves a lot of tissue paper (not to wipe your butt with) and another game involves toe sucking. I know you're all dying to play it now.

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GoodbyeGoodbyeGoodbye

I have to admit that although I might think I'm coping well with the recent events that had to happen, I'm probably not. I haven't been able to talk about it with anyone, not my best friends or even my sister. I haven't told anyone details of what happened, and I probably should at least write it in my diary so I won't forget.


But why bother remembering?

Perhaps the reason I haven't been willing to talk about it is because it's all convoluted in my head and to have to go into a single narrative of it all is daunting.

In any case, in short, it just sucks. Sucks to know that I will have to wait for a while before I can try and make an attempt on being friends, sucks to know that while he'll be saying good night and good morning to my friends, he won't be saying it to me. Sucks to be thrown out of someone's life so abruptly, to suddenly come to a complete stop.

Onto the next chapter, pls.

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Moving out/ Jane Eyre

Lately, I've been thinking about moving out a lot more often. It's not commuting that I've gotten tired of, (Although yesterday when I was busing home by myself this guy kept on staring at me and I swear he contemplating in his head of kidnapping me, luckily his stop was before mine.) but rather it's the freedom that I'm longing after.


There's so much more freedom living with your friends downtown, and you're never alone. If I wanted someone to have dinner with, I'd just call someone. Or if I wanted a break from my readings, I'd just step out and voila, entertainment. And I wouldn't be breaking my back lugging my textbooks around downtown. It'd be like having a sleepover all the time, we'd stay up talking all night, playing board games, baking, reading etc.

I have a couple of friends moving out together next year. I WISH I COULD MOVE IN WITH THEM. Unfortunately, I need money for that.

I've thought about who i'd miss if I moved out: I know I'd miss my sister my most and my parents the lease. I've never formed an attachment to them, maybe because I didn't grow up with them, unlike normal people. Maybe I'd miss my mom's cooking, but that's about it.

Ok so Jane Eyre.
So the reason it took me so long to read Jane Eyre is because I've been fiercely loyal to Jane Austen, and in my head, it was either Austen or the Bronte sisters, and I chose Austen because I was hooked on Pride and Prejudice at a very early and impressionable age. (Kind of like how you can't be a fan of Twilight and Harry Potter)

As I begun reading Jane Eyre, I realized that you really can't compare it to Pride and Prejudice. (Again, just how you can't compare Twilight to Harry Potter, simply doesn't make sense and wrong on so many levels) I like Jane Eyre though, it's like a mystery and Rochester is completely insane. I'm not done yet, so I can't say anything about the ending.

Anyway. I will blog more often. It's faster than writing in my diary.

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Dear life,

Ever have one of those moments where you go, "Wow, my life is not bad. It's actually decent."


I just had one of those, even though technically I'm suppose to be crying my eyes out, finishing the roll of toilet paper I like to keep by my desk faster than if it was in the bathroom. My recent wow-my-life-is-awesome revelation happened gradually when I realized how awesome the people in my life are.

I went to visit my grandparents today and spent the day with them since they're going to Europe soon and I had to teach them how to use my camera. After dinner, my grandma asked me what was wrong, since I looked depressed. I didn't want to tell her the reason, since it seemed petty, but at the time she asked me I was actually having a pretty pleasant time just hanging out with them. That's when I realized that my life was pretty good, to have caring grandparents who know me well enough to see that something was wrong.

Then at work the other day, my coworker Natalie, burned a season of Baccano for me to watch. To her it was no big deal, but I was soo touched she'd actually do something like that for me. I was like, NAT YOU'RE SO AWESOMEEE!! Also, a big comfort to me recently has been my good friend, Manley, who not only listened to all my emotional babblings but also volunteered to come over to my house and comfort me with ice cream. (I was at my grandparents house so she couldn't come.) This seriously cheered me up ^.^ , just knowing that I have such a fantastic friend.

I'm also really thankful for Tabi for being my companion in ... just life I guess. She's dragging me to the gym with her tomorrow after we're done with clubs day at light house to help me get rid of my belly roll fat.

This post is feeling too sappy.
Tomorrow is Friday. I'm determined to make it a good day.

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Deadline

I have a headache.


I hate friendships with a deadline.

What to do ... aii....

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Damn you Iced Caps

Can't sleep. Had too much caffeine. Work early in the morning.


Ever wonder why some people are in your life? Recently, a friend I've known for years has become a dearer friend to me because I just realized we've been through a lot of the same experiences. I told her everything since she can give me the right advice that needs to be done.

But saying it is easy, actually doing it isn't. Especially if you hate confrontations like I do. There are a lot of things that needs to be fixed because of my fear of confrontations. (Or is it simply laziness?) 

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Piss Off

Ugh.


There is nothing in this world that gets my blood boiling other than my family. 
It's like when these things happen, when they start yelling and harassing each other, slamming doors, running away, not understanding or listening, it pisses the hell out of me. That's when I'm the most pissed off and I just want to slam their heads together.

Wish they'd just get a divorce already, it's almost been ten years since they've been talking about it. I mean, my mom ALREADY has her own house.

If I had a magic button and every time I pressed it something would happen, it'd be to have better parents. Sounds like something a little kid would say, but it's for the sake of my sanity.

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