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That Was Then

Since I'm an avid reader of Post Secrets (every Sunday) I decided to make my own:
(I was looking for an outlet for my anger besides writing mean things in my diary)


I didn't put this up on flickr because I don't like how the paper looks too clean and white.


That was then out take:

That was then final:
I really like this.

And then I decided to procrastinate a bit so I took a self portrait.
SELF PORTRAITS ARE HARD! I want one of those remote control devices for your camera so that self portraits will be easier.

This is me with a tooth ache:
(Not really, it just looks like I have a tooth ache, although I'm smiling)

Outake. Dunno why I bothered with this one, it seems really awful. I just liked how it was out of focus:

What I had wanted to originally do although it looked better in my head:

I liked this the best. If you look up close you can see my wrinkles.
Anyway, if I learned anything from this, it's that the first pictures you take always end up being the best because of it's defects.


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Sometimes

Sometimes I tell myself that I should become a lawyer because I've become quite good at picking out the small details that other people might have ignored. I should hope so. That's all I ever do at school.


Then I think about all the work I have to go through, and I look at all the work other people are going through, all the applications blah blah.

And then I always end up telling myself to forget it. =) 

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Short Story

So at one point in my life I went crazy and told myself to write a short story every day for a year.


It didn't last.

Life stopped being crazy.

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Plane, Plane Flying, Plane Flying Outside the Window


This is the picture that I took:



I don't like it. I don't like the angle.
I wish there was actually a plane outside the window that I was actually staring at.

Anyway, these are the other views of the Jerry Paradise Lost shoot that I did:


This one was ok. He looks depressed that he has to read such a large book.


And this one is not convincing enough.


I've had this Jerry for a very very long time. I don't know why I take pictures of him. I think it might be because Drew died =(

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Old Bowl

Back then, I had this really close friend. Then life happened, and we drifted apart from each other. Next thing I knew, we've become mere acquaintances. 

I have recently learned that I have been replaced as a close friend to this person by another person, meaning, that close friend I once had now has a new close - best - friend. It's really sad, since I feel like I've been replaced. And it's sad because I just found out how many different close friends this person has had to go through before finding this newest close friend, who might probably be replaced, since this particular person is picky with friends.

It's like having your ex replace you with a new girl. It feels kind of like that. And it feels a little different from that. And it feels more than that. 

The other month a friend told me to reconnect with this old friend, so I did, and then realized that that person hasn't changed much since we've lost contact with each other. So how did we drift apart? I have the answers and I don't and I'm upset that this person has to be so complicated.

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Insomnia

So whatever, I can't sleep again. 

Happens every single time without fail.
This past summer it was the same crap. 
Two years ago it was the same crap.

That impending feeling of doom that I wrote about earlier might have actually just be the most accurate feeling I've had this year, so far. In a way it's kind of relieving. In the end it's just crap though.

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African Literature

Got my essay back for my African Literature today. Out of a possible 20 I got a decent 15.5 which as  my professor explained, was a mark only two people in the class received. He explained that it's almost a 16, which was an A, but not quite, and that I was only missing a few points. 


I'm quite happy with being almost there but not quite, since I didn't expect to do so well on this essay anyway, which was on African Women and how they're represented in African Literature. Also I'm pleased because only 30% of the class got an A, besides, everyone in my class is apparently a genius, they take literature very very very seriously. 

That's all I have to say.
Actually, I have something else I want to rant about but I'm getting a headache just thinking about it. I had no intention of writing about this at all. But it's a safe topic, the thing I really want to rant about doesn't need to be written here. 

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